July 27, 2024
Harry Higgins, Moxie Connoisseur

Harry Higgins, Moxie Connoisseur

LINCOLN, Maine — In the charming town of Lincoln, Maine, local man Harold “Harry” Higgins has made an audacious claim that has the entire community buzzing: he can tell the difference between Moxie, the distinct New England soft drink, and battery acid, just by their smell alone. While many people are skeptical, Harry remains steadfast in his conviction.

Residents of Lincoln have been both amused and bewildered by Harry’s claim, but that hasn’t stopped him from attempting to demonstrate his unique ability. He’s so confident in his olfactory prowess that he’s issued an open invitation for anyone in town to set up a blind smell test for him.

“I’ve been a Moxie man since I was knee-high to a grasshopper,” Harry announced proudly from his front yard, Moxie bottle in hand. “I know the sweet aroma of Moxie like the back of my hand. That battery acid smell doesn’t stand a chance!”

Can of Sweet, Sweet Moxie

Despite Harry’s enthusiasm, some Lincoln residents have voiced concern about the unusual and potentially dangerous sniff test. Local pharmacist, Penny Webster, has cautioned Harry to rethink the challenge, warning that inhaling battery acid fumes could be harmful. Harry, however, remains undaunted, trusting in his nose’s ability to detect the unmistakable scent of Moxie.

Lincoln has been set abuzz with anticipation, with neighbors placing friendly wagers on whether Harry can truly distinguish between the two substances. Others have questioned Harry’s eccentricity, noting his odd hobbies, which include cataloging the different odors of Maine’s native mushrooms and creating sculptures out of discarded soda cans.

The date for the eagerly-awaited smell test has yet to be determined, as Harry searches for a willing volunteer to prepare the potentially noxious samples. Until then, the residents of Lincoln will continue to debate the merits of Harry’s claim and the wisdom behind his peculiar challenge.

In the meantime, Moxie sales have experienced a slight surge in Lincoln, as curious townspeople taste the unique beverage in support of their quirky neighbor. Whether Harry can genuinely differentiate between Moxie and battery acid by smell alone remains to be seen, but one thing is clear: Lincoln, Maine, will never forget the legendary Harry Higgins and his extraordinary nose.

Wickedly Maine’s Note of Caution

Do not sniff battery acid.

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