May 23, 2024
Skowvegas No More

SKOWHEGAN, Maine — A group of local grumps in Skowhegan has taken umbrage with the town’s iconic nickname, “Skowvegas,” and have started a petition to change it to “Skowhamptons.” The nickname change, they argue, would better represent the town’s ongoing struggle with skyrocketing rental prices and the changing demographics of the area.

“This Skowvegas thing is just a relic of the past,” grumbled local curmudgeon, Harold Farnsworth. “It makes us sound like a bunch of gamblers, and that’s just not accurate. It’s high time we embrace the reality of our town’s rising cost of living and rebrand ourselves as ‘Skowhamptons,’ where our historic riverside town meets the price point of a ritzy East Coast retreat.”

The petition, which has gained some traction among Skowhegan residents, also includes suggestions for new town slogans such as “Where the Rent Meets the River,” and “Home of the $5 Cup of Coffee.”

Despite the grumps’ passionate pleas, not everyone in town is thrilled with the proposed name change. Local realtor, Natalie Frye, argues that the “Skowvegas” moniker represents the town’s vibrant history and should be preserved.

“Skowvegas is a fun, playful nickname that really captures the spirit of our town,” she said. “Just because we’re facing a few changes doesn’t mean we should throw away our history and start calling ourselves ‘Skowhamptons.’ We need to find a solution to the housing issue, not just change our nickname.”

As the debate continues to heat up, the Skowhegan City Council has yet to comment on the petition or the potential nickname change. Meanwhile, residents are encouraged to weigh in on the matter by either attending city council meetings or joining the growing number of online discussions.

In the meantime, the “Skowvegas” vs. “Skowhamptons” debate rages on, providing endless fodder for both sides of the argument and sparking constant conversation among the rest of the town’s residents.

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